Here's a funny email that i've just read:

An Investment Advice:

If you had purchased $1,000 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago, you would have
$49 left.

With Fannie Mae, you would have $2.50 left of the original $1,000.

With AIG, you would have less than $15 left.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer,
then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have $214
cash.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink heavily and recycle.